2. PLAN YOUR TRIP

Decide when you want to go

Remember, Australia is backwards (though you should never say that to an Australian!) in that their seasons are reversed from the Northern Hemisphere. So summer occurs during December, and winter during July. The southern two-thirds of Australia are a temperate climate zone, with temperatures roughly between 32°F to 59°F (0°C to 15°C) in the wintertime, and 59°F to 87°F (15° C- 30°C) in the summertime. Snow is incredibly rare, but you shouldn't plan any beach frolics if traveling in winter.

The northern third of Australia is a far hotter place, with temperatures ranging from 68°F to 86°F (15°C - 30°C) in winter and up to 104°F (40°C) in summer. In the north, the seasons are divided by rainfall, with the wet time lasting from November to April and the dry time from May to October. The wet season does not only mean "you will get wet" but also "you might not be able to travel, as roads may be washed out." So while planning your trip, you should always check out the predicted weather forecast.

Bear in mind that you are not the only person who wants to travel during the dry, warm seasons. The busiest time for Australian travelers is during the summer vacation, which falls between late November and mid-February. If you do travel during these months, plan well in advance to avoid last minute high costs.

Fly there

If you've made it through this swamp of responsibilities, then you must reeeeeeeeeeally want to get to Australia. But here comes the bad news: it's expensive. Damn expensive. It's "maybe-you-should-just-rent-that-Meryl-Streep-flick-about-the-dingo-and-the-baby" expensive. Most tickets to Australia are at least $1000. If you find a cheaper deal, it probably means that the plane is "engine optional." If you are committed to traveling on specific dates, you might be stuck with buying higher-priced fares through airlines or travel agents. Fortunately, we can help you out. Visit "SoYouWanna buy cheap airline tickets?" and we'll at least help you make sure that you don't get ripped off.

Well, whatever you decide, it's always nice to comparison shop, so check out:

Such agencies are very helpful at matching up your time and financial restraints. For directories that will lead you to even more online brokers, check Kasbah and The Art of Travel.

But maybe you don't care when you come and go to Australia. If you are that flexible, you should a) think about taking up yoga, and b) save some dough by traveling as an air courier. An air courier carries documents or packages overseas in exchange for heavily discounted flights. Companies like to use couriers 'cause it's cheaper to send freight as luggage than cargo. You can be assured that you will not be transporting anything illegal, as everyone knows the package will be going through customs. If your potential client asks you to hide the package from customs, perhaps in a rectal crevice, we suggest that you politely decline. The disadvantages are that you have to be ready to go at a moment's notice, and you won't have much (if any) baggage space. Still, if you are dying to get to Australia and you are broke-ish, this is an excellent method. For more information, check out The International Association of Air Travel Couriers.

Prepare your money

It's usually cheaper to pay for stuff with Australian dollars, so when you get there, you should exchange most of your money right away. Still, you don't want to be caught empty-handed, so before you leave, you should exchange what you feel is enough to get you through your first three days in Australia. Currency rates are constantly changing, but for the past year, the Australian dollar has been equal to a little over half the American dollar.

When flying out of Australia, you will have to pay AUS$27 (about $15) departure tax. This is usually included in the price of your ticket, but check ahead so that you're not searching your pockets for stray pennies at the head of an impatient line.