Everybody needs a good pair of sneakers. By "sneakers," we mean any of the huge variety of athletic shoes that are available to the lucky consumer . . . y'know, the shoes that keep Foot Locker in business. Whether you're a highly paid athlete or you just don't want to ruin your loafers while you do yard work, sneakers are handy to have around. But there while sifting through the zillions of different styles and brands, how will you ever know which sneakers to buy? By reading this article, of course. We will guide you through an easy selection and purchasing process that will put you in the right pair of sneakers. Your only other options are to try shoeless forms of entertainment, like martial arts or yoga. But you'll have to go outside some time . . .

1. KNOW WHAT ACTIVITY YOU NEED SNEAKERS FOR

We assume that you have some particular reason for wanting to own athletic shoes, even though the chances are that, like most lazy people, you aren't athletic at all. Even if you only end up using your sneakers for couch-oriented activities, it can be fun to pretend that you will use them for sports or fitness when you buy them.

Aerobics/Fitness
Baseball
Basketball
Casual Wear
Football
Hiking
Running
Soccer
Swimming
Tennis
Walking

Aerobics/Fitness

You can do aerobics or other gym-related fitness activities in running shoes, cross-trainers, or any sneaker that provides support and cushioning. Some manufacturers have shoes specifically designed for aerobics (for example, the Reebok Freestyle), but you don't need us to tell you that you can do aerobics in something called an "aerobics shoe." If you're just going to the gym to lift weights and saunter around trying to look cool, you can wear canvas shoes, hiking shoes, or just about anything else, but no sandals (stubbing your bare toe is uncool and extremely painful).

Baseball

You don't have to have 'em, but molded cleats are ideal for baseball. You can also wear running shoes or cross-trainers, but whatever you get, make sure they provide good traction. Slipping and falling on your face is great for laughs, but it's not going to win you the game (unless you're the mascot).

Basketball

Basketball requires basketball shoes. Sure, you could step on the court and jump around in all sorts of other shoes, but that's not how our corporate masters and your sports heroes have designed the current recreational etiquette. Not only do you have to wear basketball shoes and no other sort, but you must also replace them no less frequently than every six months, lest you get arrested by the basketball fashion police.

Casual Wear

This isn't really an activity, but it's probably the most common use for sneakers anyway. Just being casual is one of our favorite pastimes. Just about any of the shoes we describe can be worn around as casual footwear, but we recommend walking shoes or canvas shoes, running shoes or basketball shoes, and cross-trainers or tennis shoes, in that order (from most to least recommended). We don't recommend wearing cleats anywhere but on an athletic field. They ruin your floors, and they can be slippery on hard surfaces. Hiking shoes or boots are popular enough with some people, but that's probably precisely because they aren't recommended by people who write articles about shoes. It wouldn't be much fun being a rugged iconoclast if we suggested that you do it.

Football

Football requires molded cleats, and you'd be ill-advised to try to play with any shoe with less traction than these provide. You can slip on wet grass and mud just by walking on it, so just think how on-your-ass you'll be if you're wearing the wrong shoe when some monstrous football player smashes into you.

Hiking

Hiking "boots" have evolved from their heavy, awkward origins to look more and more like sneakers. Hiking shoes are the best choice for hiking, because they provide good ankle support and traction without being too heavy. Running shoes and cross-trainers are okay, too, but they're not ideal because they won't protect your ankles from scratchy underbrush or joint-jarring slips on uneven terrain.

Running

We hope nobody is surprised that we recommend running shoes for running. Most other shoes are too heavy and/or don't provide enough cushioning, thus wreaking havoc on your knees and ankles.

Soccer

Soccer is best played in molded cleats, but plenty of people adapt running shoes or cross-trainers for soccer as well. Again, traction is the watchword for soccer and all sports that involve running on dodgy surfaces.

Swimming

Just kidding! Did we fool you? Actually, you will need footwear (that is, fins) to go scuba diving, but that's a whole different SYW all together.

Tennis

Again, it should come as no surprise that tennis shoes are best for tennis. Many people play tennis in running shoes, canvas shoes, or cross trainers, but these shoes are not ideal because they don't provide adequate support for the side to side movements required in tennis and other racquet sports.

Walking

Walking is a pretty low-key activity, so pretty much any shoe with good cushioning for the soles of your feet would be sufficient. There are, however, walking shoes that are designed for the particular comfort of the walker, and we recommend them for those who walk for exercise or transportation.

2. PICK AN APPROPRIATE SNEAKER

You've chosen your activity and you know what sorts of sneaker options you have. Now you simply have to match the activity's recommended footwear to the appropriate description(s) below and see which sounds sneak sound like it's the one for you. Just do it.

Basketball shoes
Canvas shoes
Cleats
Cross-trainers
Hiking shoes
Running shoes
Tennis shoes
Walking shoes

Basketball shoes

The basketball shoe has a leather or synthetic upper, a mid to high top, a rubber sole, and lots of support for the ankles. This support can come from bizarre innovations like air pumps, helium pockets, etc. Basketball shoes are as much about form as they are about function, and many pro basketball players have lent their names to a particular brand of shoe. These superstar shoes are expensive but fashionable, and we'll leave it up to you to decide how flashy you want your shoes to be. You know without us telling you that a shoe without the bells and whistles or a star name attached to it is perfectly fine for playing b-ball, so long as it is well constructed. You can get a good pair for $60 to $90, and if you want to spend more, there are limitless opportunities for you to do so.

Canvas shoes

The canvas shoe is of simple construction, with a canvas upper and a rubber sole. They can come in high or low tops, and a wide range of colors. The kings of the canvas shoes, and, to some, of all sneakerdom, are Converse All Stars. These are also known as "Chucks" to their fans, because they bear the signature of 1920s Converse salesman and endorser Chuck Taylor. Both Converse and Keds have been making canvas shoes since 1917, so you'll be joining a proud tradition if you choose these. You'll also be choosing not to take advantage of over 80 years of sneaker innovation, and that might not be such a great idea. Canvas shoes are cool and casual, but they don't provide much support or cushioning, so they're not very good for any athletic activities. In fact, they're downright awful for your arches. But one of the best things about them is that they're cheap: you can pick up a good pair for $20-$30.

Cleats

Cleats are the small spikes on the bottoms of shoes used for baseball, soccer, football, and other sports played on grassy or muddy terrain. The shoes that bear these cleats are also called cleats, and they come in a variety of styles. Metal cleats are great for traction, but they can make a lot of noise if you have to wear them on hard surfaces, they chew up a car's floormats, and they can be really nasty if they go astray and hit an opponent or a teammate (we hope that's not something you want to happen). Instead, we recommend molded cleats, made from hardened rubber or plastic, as they avoid or at least diminish these hazards, and they're just as good for traction. You can get a decent pair for $40 to $70, but a lot of the soccer shoes are really snazzy and they get expensive quickly. Don't come crying to us if you find yourself seduced by something colorful with a cool name that sets you back $150. We'll just laugh and say, "We told you so."

Cross-trainers

Cross-trainers are usually made with leather or synthetic uppers, rubber soles, and low or mid tops. They are intended to be useful for a wide variety of activities, such as running, aerobics, weightlifting, or bothering vendors in malls. Their detractors say that they are actually not useful for anything (the cross-trainers, not the vendors), because the sneaks are too heavy for running, they don't provide sufficient support for other sports, blah blah blah. We're not going to take sides on this, but we'll say that if you're hardcore into running, tennis, or their ilk, you should probably buy the shoes designed specifically for the activity. If, however, you like to dabble in a lot of things, cross-trainers will see you through them all well enough. A decent pair of cross-trainers will run you anywhere from $40-$70, and there are some high-end ones that go for up to around $130.

Hiking shoes

Hiking shoes, also known as trail shoes or hiking boots, are characterized by sturdy construction, high tops, and darker colors than most other athletic shoes (that way, they won't show dirt as much). These are designed to give you good traction on uneven surfaces, protect you from scrapes and twists on uneven surfaces, and to look rugged. A good pair will usually cost around $60-$80, but you can, of course, find them cheaper and more expensive.

Running shoes

Running shoes are usually made with a leather or synthetic upper, low tops, and cushioned rubber soles. The main things you want from a running shoe are good padding between you and the cold hard ground, light weight, and front to back support. Every athletic shoe store or online shoe source will have a section devoted to running shoes, and these will all be designed with the runner's needs in mind. You don't want to skimp on running shoes, and you should replace them frequently if you use them a lot, because you need good cushioning between you and the ground to avoid running-related traumas (aside from the random acts of dog poop). You can get a good pair for $60-$90.

Tennis shoes

Tennis shoes can look a bit odd, because they often have extensive molding on the sides of the shoes. This is because they have to provide side-to-side support, due to the tendency to move laterally in tennis and other racquet sports. They have leather or synthetic uppers, low tops, and rubber soles. The lower-end models tend to look a bit like running shoes or walking shoes, and they provide less support. As with running shoes, you should probably spend upwards of $60 if you want to get a good pair, and you can spend a lot more if you want all the bells and whistles.

Walking shoes

These shoes are designed for comfort and overall support, and you can get a variety of features to suit your needs. Motion control shoes have rigid construction, and they keep you from pronating (bending in at the ankle when you walk). Stability shoes are more flexible, but still provide good support. Race walking shoes are lighter and more flexible, and we really hope you will purchase these because race walking is one of the most amusing things a person can do. As Dave Barry once wrote: "You'll know you're doing it right when passing motorists laugh so hard they drive into trees." If, however, you're looking for something for casual wear and the occasional romantic stroll, just pick the one that looks good to you and, most importantly, feels the most comfortable. A good, standard walking shoe can be had for $40-$70, while motion control, stability, or race walking shoes tend to be more in the $80-$100 range.

3, FIND A GOOD PLACE TO BUY SNEAKERS

Now that you know what you wanna do and what kind of sneakers you need to do it, now all you need is a place to buy them. We all know that the best way to get great deals and selection is to buy on the Internet, right? If you don't know that, please read the preceding sentence over and over until you believe it. It's the wave of the future, baby. Unfortunately, if it hasn't occurred to you yet, it will become very clear when you read step 4 that you shouldn't buy shoes until you've tried them on. Hmm . . . that throws a bit of a wrinkle into your bargain hunting online. We'll provide you with some clever options. Why? Because we're clever and we like to show it off.

First (and most obviously) you could go to a shoe store and buy shoes there. If you want the best selection and the most knowledgeable staff, you should go to a store that specializes in sneakers and other athletic gear. If you want the lowest prices, you should go to one of those big "warehouse-style" shoe places that have high turnover and lots of bargains. Shoe stores will often advertise their specials in the newspaper or elsewhere, so you can check to see where the styles and brands you want are available for the best prices.

Another, sneakier (ha!) option would be to try on shoes in a shoe store and then buy them online. You can do this by going to a shoe store, finding the brand, style, and size of shoe that you want and then looking online to see if you can get a better deal. Remember to write down the model number before you leave the store so you can be sure you get the exact same shoe you tried on. Alternatively, you can browse online and find shoes you like for a good price, go to a shoe store (call them first to make sure they have the brand you want), make sure they feel good, find out what size you need, and then go back home and buy them online.

A final, braver, lazier option would be to throw caution to the wind and simply buy shoes online without trying them on. We don't recommend this, but it might work out for you if you're simply replacing a worn-out pair of shoes with the exact same kind, or if you find that, say, size 9.5 shoes from a certain manufacturer always fit you.

4. MAKE SURE THE SNEAKERS FIT PROPERLY

Many sports injuries unnecessarily occur for two reasons: 1) you use the wrong shoe for the activity (see step 1), or 2) your shoes don't fit properly. It's important to remember that your shoe size, whatever you ordinarily think it is, should not completely dictate what shoes you wear. A size 10 shoe from one manufacturer might fit you perfectly, while another size 10 shoe will be too small. What's most important is how the shoe feels on your foot.

It's best to try shoes on late in the day, because your feet swell over the course of a day and you don't want a shoe that only fits in the morning. You should also wear socks of the same thickness as those you'll wear during your shoe's intended activity. Remember to check for width, too. If you have an extra-wide foot, get wide shoes (duh!). In North American sizing, the width of shoes is indicated by a letter or letters after the number (D, E, and EEE are extra-wide sizes). Don't buy a shoe that's too long in order to make up for it being too narrow; it may eventually stretch to fit your foot, but your foot will be spilling out over the sides of the soles. Long story short: don't just get a shoe that's a half a size off because they don't have your actual size. You'll feel it in the morning. Merely ask the sales clerk to order you a pair in your size.

Once you've got both shoes on, lace them up and see how they feel. There should be about half an inch between your longest toe and the end of the shoe - you can tell by pushing down on the front of the shoe with your thumb to see what's air and what's toe. If you feel pain, you've hit toe. Walk around a bit, and if you're not self-conscious or in too small of an area, try running a few steps or jumping. The shoes should feel comfortable right away. Never mind that nonsense about breaking in shoes - sneakers are designed for comfort, and if they're not working for you right off the bat, they're not the shoes for you. If there's room for your toe, your heel doesn't slip around, and the shoes feel good, they are good candidates for your new sneaks. Again, YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE TO "GET USED" TO YOUR NEW SHOES. If they fit right, you'll know instantly.

And now you're completely ready to go running, play soccer, and cause general sporting mayhem. Break a leg!