5. CONSIDER BUYING
Perhaps youre one of those practical people who thinks its absurd to spend $100 to rent a tux when you can have one to call your own for the price of about three or four rentals. You make a good point. But before you part with your cash, consider these factors:
- Think about how often you attend formal affairs. Your average red-blooded American male wears a tuxedo once a year, or maybe even less. In this case it might not be worth purchasing, considering the maintenance that is required. Moreover, when you buy a tuxedo, you must also purchase all of the accessories that accompany it.
- Consider that styles change. A tuxedo purchased today may be out of style in ten years. If you decide to purchase, make sure its a classic design that will stay in fashion for the longest possible amount of time. This means no cargo-pocket tuxedo pants for you, buddy.
- Consider that measurements change. How can we say this politely? Sometimes people go through periods of distress, and they tend to pack on a few pounds. Or sometimes chubbos actually get their asses in gear and shed the lard When your tux doesnt fit, you must acquit . . . err, alter. Which can be annoying.
- Remember that different tuxes are required for different occasions. As we discussed earlier, evening formal affairs require different attire than summer afternoon weddings. Purchasing a tuxedo might not save you much hassle at all. Be prepared to outfit yourself in several jackets and accessories to match different occasions that come up.
Were not members of the National Tuxedo-Renting Alliance or anything like that; we just wanted to point out that buying is often not the best choice for novices.
Formal wear for men is fairly simple. There's a reason for that: men are dumb. So if we successfully remove every single bit of necessary thought from the process, we feel we've done our job. Good luck on getting suited up, and be sure to send pictures, you handsome devil.
